Recent Twitter Projects
(ED NOTE: preserving twitter content is hard in 2024. I've avoided embedding real tweets or even linking to them here when possible.)
I haven’t written about this here yet, but for the better part of the last year I’ve been experimenting with twitter bots. Specifically, I’ve been using Cheap Bots Done Quick, a phenomenal tool that allows anyone to build a twitter bot with very little effort.
It uses Tracery, a syntax that I have used a few times in Twine as well. Tracery allows you to create sort of mad-libs style randomized text passages, and by nesting its structures within one another you can create quite sophisticated constructions.
I currently have four twitter bots active, only three of which I actually like.
The joke here is that it’s a really bad writing prompt bot that only suggests bad mashups of existing intellectual properties/TV and film tropes. It’s not very big and is not very capable of producing interesting, intricate tweets. However, every once in a while it turns out something quite charming indeed:
a world-war-two codebreaker and their brother are the only ones who can stop a global zombie plague — Writing Prompts (@howboutyouwrite) February 11, 2016
what if commander shepherd were a snail— Writing Prompts (@howboutyouwrite) February 10, 2016
after an accident, a veteran must learn to overcome their phobia of bones — Writing Prompts (@howboutyouwrite) February 10, 2016
a stoner and an astronaut work together to discover a horde of nazi gold — Writing Prompts (@howboutyouwrite) February 9, 2016
This bot is my absolute favorite that I’ve helped make so far. I made it with my friend Tara, who does not use twitter. It generates endless Sherlock Holmes mystery titles and is absolutely glorious and perfect.
The Case of the Eleven Tiger Hunters — Casebook Generator (@autodoyle) February 10, 2016
The Matter of the Gold Prospector’s Corpse — Casebook Generator (@autodoyle) February 7, 2016
The Sulking Attractive Young Person Mystery — Casebook Generator (@autodoyle) January 26, 2016
I sometimes respond to autodoyle tweets with my own little flash-fiction story excerpts. Some other people have started doing this too! They’re often quite good. Here are some of my favorite ones I’ve done.
Holmes unfurls a white sheet covered in holes. “DAMN IT, I ALMOST GOT AWAY WITH IT, TOO,” shrieks Charlie Brown [quote tweet] — Laura ‘Laura’ Michet (@lmichet) January 3, 2016
“I’m arresting the blimp,” Sherlock says “THAT’S WHAT YOU THINK,” the blimp intones. It begins to slowly release air [quote tweet] — Laura ‘Laura’ Michet (@lmichet) January 28, 2016
“…where ‘painting’ is a euphemism for ‘gigantic blood splat,'” Watson tells Doyle with relish [quote tweet] — Laura ‘Laura’ Michet (@lmichet) November 11, 2015
“I’m afraid this isn’t the real Gumby,” Holmes announced, dropping the cloth back over the corpse’s face [quote tweet] — Laura ‘Laura’ Michet (@lmichet) October 9, 2015
This bot I made all by myself over the holidays. It generates X-Files plots out of thin air! I wrote it during an X-Files binge and I think it’s quite good for what it is.
Scully seeks chill through prayer. Mulder accidentally offends a pest exterminator by ranting about cultists. — Some X Files (@assortedfiles) February 10, 2016
Scully rejects proof of alien ghosts. Doggett grabs a nanny angrily by the lapels. — Some X Files (@assortedfiles) February 10, 2016
Scully tries to disprove brain implants. Mulder tries to save Scully from ‘government cancer’. — Some X Files (@assortedfiles) February 10, 2016
This is not a twitter bot! It is a REAL RESTAURANT that tweets dishes, specials, social events, and random news about goings-on in the small town of Earlmouth, Massachusetts. I “discovered” it with a few friends of mine– this guy and this guy— over the holidays.
There’s a lot of really weird stuff going on in Earlmouth! Alice and Sam, owners of the restaurant, are frequently at odds with their ex-busboy, Justin B, who disapproves of the cult they have helped to start. Everyone’s eating some weird fish, Trench Wizard, and arguing about whether it is responsible for all the bleeding they’re doing out of their many orifices. There’s a “ceremony” out on the bay every Friday night. Weird shit! Weird shit!
Our catch of the day is Bioluminescent Lobster! — Slug-In-Hand Tavern (@sluginhand) February 10, 2016
Come to the Slug at 9:30 and enjoy music by Beatrice Franklin and the Phones — Slug-In-Hand Tavern (@sluginhand) February 6, 2016
THE MOON RISES THE KELP BLOOMS THE WISE MAN OF THE ABYSS SPEAKS TO US IN THE LONG NIGHT BLOOD BLOOD FOR HIS CUP — Slug-In-Hand Tavern (@sluginhand) February 6, 2016
Guys I have no idea why you think this is good restaurant social media — Justin B. — Slug-In-Hand Tavern (@sluginhand) February 6, 2016